I didn’t say that, or “Here’s why you’re wrong”

So yesterday I had a slight argument with my son, and a while after it was over I was fidgety as I get when stressed. My husband Karl asked what was wrong. I said, well, it was the arguing, I really don’t like arguing.  He said, in surprise: “But you’re so good at it!”

What?  Like, I can’t stand arguing. I like peace and harmony. I’m not “good” at it.  I refuse to accept that.  I was like “uh, what do you mean by that?” (Getting a little affronted).  He was surprised I didn’t find what he’d said to be a compliment. “Well, you always know what to say, and how to counter whatever the other person said.” 

My daughter, frequently my defender, was frantically motioning for Karl to stop from the sidelines.  I turned to her. “Peregrine, is that me?  Do I argue a lot?  Am I good at it?” and she was like “No, of course not mom.  You just know what to say in response to people.”  To which I was like “Yeah, because I listen to them.”  She said “That’s right. You really listen to the people you’re arguing with, so you know how to use what they say to make your points.  You can only be a good debater if you know what you’re debating.”  Gulp.

So I did the only thing I could do at that point, which was go and hug and apologize to my son.  I said I didn’t know I argued like that. He said “Mom, how could you not know?  That’s just who you are.  Everyone knows that about you.”

Sniff. I only want to use my powers for good. 

Hmmm … if this computer science thing goes bust, is there a way to turn this into income?

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